word world and stuff

so yesterday david was not as impressed w/ word world as he originally was. i am debating putting up video of him just sitting there reading a book while they all dance and sing that "WE JUST BUILT A WORD! HOORAY! WE BUILT IT!" Wtf as if that makes sense.

oh god that reminds me!!! that fucking songs by carl or wtfever guy pissed me off yesterday! he is this guy with a guitar on pbs kids in between shows and he looks like a rejected wiggle that is not australian? OH wait i think his name is songs by steve or geetar steve i dont know. anyway. that isnt the point.

the point is that this guy usually is decent by david's standards. i give him a 6/10 on a good day. but yesterday he was singing this ridiculous song that went something like "rain rain pitter patter pitter patter" and i am looking at the television and i see... a playground with tons of shadows and really bright lights. and no water or rain to be found. i mean not to mention the obvious thing of no one even being wet!.

so i said to david "DAVID DONT LISTEN TO THE TELEVISION. there is no rain, i have no idea what the fuck that guy is singing about. he is DELUSIONAL. rain is that wet shit we showed you a week or so ago!" we did too. we took him out in the rain and just let him stand his little feets in it! it was warm enough, lol.

LONG ABSENCE

but i am back now. husband back in school. i turned on pbs kids awhile ago and there was this show called "super readers" on and it was sort of like sesame street NINE THOUSAND with counting and shit but they all use PDAs and computers and fly through outer space and shit. it wasn't bad.

i like this pbs kids because they have these little shorts in between shows where they sing songs and david dances to pretty much anything [including "karma police" which i didn't think was really possible] and some weird smiley dude just sang a song about lines and circles while playing the guitar and i was feeding david his second banana and he would dance between bites, lol. now there's a short where they jump and repeat shit but david likes music better.

now clifford is coming on. he isn't dancing to the credits, which pretty much means that this show sucks. see, david LOVES credits. they are his favorite part of any show.

wow what was the name of the old black woman in the stand? i didn't get that far in the book but jason made me watch the miniseries that they made in the 90s and the corn looked so fake. anyway... this woman in clifford reminded me of her and now clifford is playing with this purple frou frou paris hilton type dog and a yellow dog. and... another dog slid down clifford. and they are playing. this is boring and david is just playing with his car seat. he gives clifford a thumbs down fo sho.

nova

well there's nothing douchey on pbs so david and i are watching some nova. i cannot say anything snarky about nova. he is teething. help.

barney 3

baby bop is jonesing for some snow. freaking cokehead. she's seriously pacing around the deck and tapping her foot. now she's pissed..

GET THIS GIRL SOME COKE AND FAST.

she's annoying me

barney again

now they are talking about eating snow that tastes like bubblegum.

don't eat the yellow snow, guise. omg this song is disturbing.

BARNEY.

good god. so i'm eating a burrito and david was bugging me again so i turned on pbs again. and it's barney.

baby bop feels "funny." she probably has diarrhea.

so i guess this is the super special winter episode where barney teaches the dumbasses in town about how winter works. now they are singing a song about different things that are cold. snow, ice, brr. i wish i was a bear with fur. because it rhymes with fur.

david keeps making happy noises at the tv. i hope i'm not traumatizing him.

they keep wishing for snow but i'm not sure it snows inside a studio with astroturf...

m&m part II

ok...

the theme song was really weird and forced. it's maya. and miguel. brother and sister and blah blah rhymes with miguel.

so maya is playing with some cheerleading sluts right now. one of her friends is wearing pink lipstick and i think she's like 7. maya's voice is really annoying.

the other friend has to go home to have a Very Serious Talk with her parents. oh wow. she has to move. haha kid. and you thought you had a stable place to call home. and she has to move to HONG KONG. man her parents must hate her.

now she's hugging a parrot wtf

maya and miguel

well i'm eating some bread so that means it's time for some pbs.

the sponsor "commercials" are starting now and an unknown show is coming on. I CAN'T WAIT.

ok maya and miguel. never seen this. this should be good.

bob part II

well the otters episode was solved rather quickly. the blue tractor was talking to some otters, which looked like squirrels, and they stepped on some fresh cement. so the cement truck (which i think was orange) came and poured more cement. that was a nail biter.

bob the builder

this weird loon with a pumpkin head and ice cream cone nose and an indecipherable accent just had a bunch of apples fall on his head. also the green steamroller crushed a bunch of apples and feels like shit about that. the bald guy with the 70s porn mustache assured the green steamroller that it's ok and he knows it's an accident.

now they've given the green steamroller the job of rolling over a bunch of apples because they were too hard. ok... it only took them 5 hours to make apple juice. good job guys.

next episode is called lofty and the otters.

bob the builder is barking out orders at his machines. he's a nazi.

the blue tractor's mouth doesn't move when he or she talks. i think the blue tractor is schizophrenic.

explanation of blog

lately my 8 month old has been extremely clingy and not letting me eat so i turned on the idiot box for him, tuned it to pbs, and i am now watching bob the builder as i eat some nachos. we don't watch tv here, prefer netflix or tv online for the few shows we do watch. this is the first time i've done this for a distraction.

i will now make short entries about what is going on in tv land